fading
somewhere past paper thin
wisps of mourning
unreclaimed images
—
Many of my poems recently have been starting our long; I let them sit and then find myself stripping away words and lines that seem to clutter the feelings that first prompted me to write. Some moments I think I could write more without disturbing the essence if I were a better poet. Other moments, it seems just right.
It’s an art to say much with less words. The simplicity and brevity of a poem makes the impact often stronger.
groetjes, Francina
Your short poem touched me again. I’ve noticed myself going towards the form of poem, though I feel I can’t call myself a ‘poet’. It is something about distilling the essence… the empty space that allows discovery. Loving the openness that happens with less words.
This one seems just right. I really like it (and your other poetry as well). I used to do something similar with my novel writing..I’d put in all these details and specifics, and when I revised it was usually to delete large portions, sometimes whole chapters. I think it’s a natural progression.
“I have made this letter longer, because I have not had the time to make it shorter.” – Blaise Pascal (1623-1662)
Brevity can be very beautiful, but it does take time to whittle and hone down to the bare bones leaving just the magic of meaning in essence. I tend to let it spill and do not craft as much as my editor would like 🙂 (that would be me). It can be a complex process to be simple. -x.M
Absolutely wonderful quote, thank you so much for sharing it.
I was at a weekend workshop recently on the Zen priesthood and forms of practice. As we discussed and practiced them, this idea of simplicity through complexity kept arising. It is a wonderful, beautiful truth, and I am so glad you spoke it here. Blessings~
Indeed. I find that much of my work lately is the work of pruning, winnowing. I have always wanted to write long epic pieces, but alas, it seems that is not my lot. Almost everything longer that I do (even just long lines) I am not happy with until I chop it down and down…
I love especially that you have tagged this “dukka.” Funny how much we must let go of what we are trying to say in order to truly speak it.
You speak it very well, indeed.
Thank you, Johnny, for your visit and such a heartfelt response. I have the same experience, too, with lines. Too long, too long…
I love the reframing in your comment: how much we must let go of what we are trying to say in order to truly speak it. It is quite beautiful and full of wisdom, I think. I am grateful you put it just so…
Be well, my friend~
I. too, edit down. There’s something about keeping it minimal I relate to. This is lovely.
Thank you, Pam, I am so happy that you find a connection there. I appreciate your visit and thoughtful comment, as always. Be well~
A core is often more revealing.
I like what remains…if anything.
Isn’t it? I find the impulse, when the core is compelling is to want to say more, to expand…as if it would add something. I think the process, too, means something… Thank you, as always, for your visit. Be well~
Your poem is a perfect example of when less is more. Thank you for sharing it.
And thank you for saying so, I am grateful. Thank you for your visit – be well this day~